Riding the Storm Out - Off Day in Santa Cruz )-:

I took advantage of the metropolis and hotel last night, stocking up at the very groovy new New Leaf Community Market (the co-op was way too far) in Santa Cruz.  Tons of vegan goodness and all in my tummy now.

Checking the news and weather sites was less heartening.  The major Pacific storm is supposed to bring up to 6 inches of rain and winds up and above 60 mph on the peaks.  I am hoping that it will blow over and let me ride again.  The rain isn't the biggest problem though.  I am approaching the Big Sur portion of highway 1 and it is prone to slides and closures, especially after a bunch of rain at once.  It doesn't look so good but I have had 11 nice days and there were only a few left.  I am only a 2 hour drive from my sister, so we are holding.

I am trying to keep my road mentality and not get too civilized, but it's tough.  The urge to eat every calorie available is tough to break, even after as short a tour as mine.  As Phoenix over on sdbikecommuter.com said, you get "in it"-- a bike touring mentality where your head is in a place that makes the road and your routine the only thing there is.  Getting it going again might be hard, I don't know.

I've been thinking a lot about being "in it" and hopefully it hasn't all leaked out while I dwell in comfort.  The first thing that I wanted to put down were my morning feelings.  That is the hardest time of day for me, and I suspect, for most bike tourers.  First is the chore of getting your gear organized and re-packed and getting underway.  I try to get as much of that done at night was possible, but you tend to be pretty blown and the time for bed just comes and you don't argue.  By far the hardest part is the beginning miles, especially if their is any climbing.  Unless your everyday life is pretty intense, I doubt most of us are used to pedalling a heavy loaded bike day-after-day with no rest days.  The aches come, for me, mostly in the knees.  I"m sure it is just use soreness, but it still makes mornings a toil.

So as you pedal with soreness in the morning, doubts hit.  All thoughts of stopping that I've had have come during this period.  I just think of that time, later in the day, when everything starts to feel better again, and the mileage countdown gets close to camp and a meal.  That is what happens when you are "in it."  At those times, and when I'm snug in my bag at night, I want to keep doing this as long as I can.

Another element is the fear of reaching the goal and not knowing what to do.  Some people, like Scott over at Powercycle.net, have allayed this by going of on a life's journey.  My sister asked if this would be a bummer for me if I had to pull the plug now and come home.  I don't know, this is my first little tour.  I do know, however, that I am not at all averse to planning the next one as a longer pull, especially with the minor knowledge that I've acquired so far.

I don't want to get too philosophical about a potential journey's end right now, though, because I don't want to think that way unless it is over for sure.  Right now, it is awfully shitty up here-- the power has been off most of the morning, but I have the resources to wait things out if that is what I decide.

The other thing is not taking all this too seriously.  I went to the laundromat this morning and Santa Cruz's permanent "camping" population was there in numbers.  Those guys are living this type of life and they aren't riding the storm out in a hotel.  This is just a game for me.  When I stop, I can walk into a store and buy what I want.  If I want to quit, I can call my sister a few minutes south, and she'll come get me.  So while it has been quite an experience during my brief time out, it really is just a self-created game, no matter what reality my mind creates.  With that in mind, whatever happens, I am happy with the fun I've had.  If I find myself getting too serious about it, hopefully I will remember that and the guys in the laundromat.

All that said, I'm going to head out and find a really big burrito and hope for a big break in the weather.